|| left alone. *||

Saturday, October 31, 2009

The 2nd wedding day

Today was a long day agn.... ok lets c.
woke up at 6+ to 7, saw everyone asleep, dozed off.
Woke up agn at 7.18, 7min to wash up/prepare/walk to sch? no way. Continued to sleep.
9am woke up, bride and groom came my house to dunno do wad, im probably half asleep. well, i slept at 1am ytd =/
thn aft tht, DotA. Mr soh called at bout 10+, gave him the reason i had to attend wedding. no mc at all.
left house at 11.30, for some catholic church at bukit batok. Rehearsal started at 12, actualy stuff ltr. stand/sit for bout 2hrs be4 goin home.(Attending wedding sux. i wished i went to sch.... missed ppl)
Went to sch to giv sci file/body world consent form/money/travel plan form. Took report book, couldnt take my 2 certs cuz mr chong went for lessons. Met kevin, walked home tgt.
DotA-ed till 5+, went to the furama hotel at clarke quay. Took our time, reached at bout 7+. Joked/chatted arnd, cleared the peanuts, destroyed some stuff.. ( nt literally )
Went into the ballroom. Waited thr like for eternity while joking.
Some interesting programmes, amazing dragon dance. Dinner started. Programmes such as the proposal continued. Finally programmes ended, left food. Joked arnd as usual, my family, jokers. Yeah thn MRT-ed home. Time check 12.30 now. so reached home bout 12.

Btw, its drink some tea/ pray some stuff first.
Thn wedding,
thn dinner.

Pics ltr.

Ok here:

Kinda my latest picture aft a long time. Looks betta enlarged.

The vow part..

Some gospel reading.

Still the vow part.

And yeah, still the vow part.

Yeah exchanging rings/vows.

Same.

Ok this is boring.

Same...

Souvenir.

Taken with flash.

Yeap. The car and some people.

Some pics.

Vow agn.

yesh its still the same...

me my family and relatives? o.o

another view.

its the same thing.

same agn.

Yesh, the wedding car :)

Omg the ring barer is so cute. lawlx.

same agn...

The amazing dragon dance?

Click here if you cant c it properly.

Click here if you cant c it properly.

As you have noticed, No order at all.

I felt different during the wedding, thr was this one part, whr the lights were flashing and changing uncontrollably and the music was lost, making all other noises lost in it. It actually brought me to another world, and thn everything was blue/red/green/black/white/whatsoever with the lights. And yea, it felt amazing. too bad i cant take a vid.

always waiting. -12:26 AM

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

nuthin much to blog today anyway. just dota-ed 1 match. i tink someone angry liao, tmrw in sch sure come sch guailan/kp me with other ppl. steady 1. Assisst hero tio ks :) Thn yea u get the point... its ok, everybody has to learn some day, bout tinkin for others and nt just bout themselves. Think of the big picture. Draft/pub still the same. yea so i jsut updated my blog for the sake o it, i dun wan it to die? yea so... yea.

i miss her. -
we were brothers, no longer. -
we are brothers. -
we are great frens. -
I've hurt thm. -
They've hurt me. -
I can rely on them. -
I cant rely on thm. -
They cant be read. -

always waiting. -10:02 PM

Monday, October 26, 2009

Got back results, 9As, first in class, 3rd in sch. Agn. Anyway, i pwnt marcus. I was copying everything he said and he wanted to make me say, "im a gay", so he said "im a gay", instead of copying tht i said im nt and took a print screen. :)

always waiting. -10:18 PM

I cant say how I feel anymore. Maybe im just too kind. Its bad enough not being able to say it properly, now i cant. Do u knw how hard it is? :)

Sometimes you just have to smile
pretend everything's okay
hold back the tears
and just walk away.

always waiting. -4:05 PM

Saturday, October 24, 2009

wad is happening...

I dun even knw if ur my fren, everytime u do smth, i suspect u. sometimes i see thru ur plans, sometimes i just cant tell. everytime u do smth, i suspect u. i just cant trust u, u make me suspect u, ur actions can be tht fake, and it can be tht real. uve fooled me time and time agn, im scared. not being an ordinary person , made me one of the few tht can look deep inside u, everytime i try to expose u, idk whether im doin the right thing or not, u made it seem so real, yet so fake, i cant tell whether its the truth in ur actions or words. everyone else will see me as the bad guy, only u and i knw. the worse thing is, no one will understand wad im saying. i feel useless... i cant tell whether ur the bad guy or not. maybe its just my level, tht even i suspect myself, or ive reached the level to point out evil. its the human's brain tht can resort to public tht hav no idea wads happening to help u in ur cause, to gain manpower and overpower the other party. ive seen tht alot on tv. watchers can tell, but if theyre in the show. can they? But if im wrong, im making things complicated and hurting u.. i dun even knw if ur acting whn ur hurt. ill be the bad guy... at least thts wad ppl will see me as... i dun get it..

always waiting. -4:33 PM

Thursday, October 22, 2009

i havent blogged today, have i? we'll start with... ok forget tht part. How about, during assembly we were scared stiff cuz our hair was long, thn we go back to class, thn blah blah blah. recess blah blah blah, thn blah blah blah. this is one of the most strictest school ever. Exams over = Homework/hairchecks smlj = = As if its the start of the school or nxt week goin to exam = = Yeah, so i was satisfied with Math, although i did a stupid mistake, english 0.1 mark to A2 = = Dnt A1, yea im satisfied. Chinese failed, bout 30+ or 40+, thn art 1 mark to A1, at least for the exam, thn add in our other scores, i tink ill get lower. Damn it sia, i couldve done betta with more time... My drawing was better thn terence, and thn his gt colour mine dun, he gt higher TT_TT haizz. thn science, gt the highest in overall in our class, thn john gt a few more marks thn he higher = = thn ancel oso get more marks. walao i go emo liao. if i read.. i couldve changed question 1 to 5 and gt 3 more marks ... = =thn geog i oso gt A1, satisfied. yea so, thts bout it.at least thrs no school tmrw.

always waiting. -8:36 PM

Monday, October 19, 2009

picnic?

today was, boring. unusual but boring. So i was dota-ing and blah blah blah with klins until it finally reached 12.45, took our time to reach thr . was late. Gave a surprised attack on terence and thn wet his phone. haizzz. Played on, and thn was hating someone thru out. Hated tht guy. Shldnt hav saved him, shldnt hav played along with him. Does he even care for others properly, think about others wad the fuck will they feel, and doesnt knw wrongs and how to apologise, and can continue like no fucking shit happened. I was so foolish. Haha, did i fall for his tricks? i guess i did. i was a sucker. but no more, i was such a great friend, i was such a great guy. but u hurt me, leaving one of the deepest scars in history. there were 3? why? becuz u were close. becuz of all the good times we had. becuz of our friendship. But now i realise, i cant be with a gay. Acts like a girl, personality like a girl, wadeva like a girl. just not a girl. I treated u like a brother, but u disappointed me. Until we find our mistakes, i wont even treat u like my imagination. ur nt thr. ur gettin too close, it makes me jealous. if u were to ask me to trust u, i wouldve said yes, but i cant do it. uve helped me alot, but i would appreciate if u kindly gtfo.

So we just played in the water, and thn bathed/changed thn go into the playground and hav some childhood memories be4 goin back. Wad was the best thing i do? or the only thing i did? nothing. How am i gonna get it? i cant. i knw im a failure. even how great i am, ive been nerfed in certain aspects. maybe im doomed all my life to nt being able to make it, ill just go along as life wans me to, nt how i wan to. becuz itll nver work.

always waiting. -6:51 PM

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Salvador Dalorei

In my giving up, ive succeeded. Well, im glad i knocked some sense into u. Life is full of surprises, and yea, ur full of surprises as well. Anyway, u cant be read at all. So i didnt sleep agn last night, today was diff cuz i felt no sign of fatigue. awkward, yes i knw. i dota-ed thru. cuz it was so bored. made my mum angry agn, but i dun really care. i especially miss her, it sux to feel helpless. Anyway, imma go start some designing or drawing now. just feel like. probably cuz she reminds me of it? it always happens. a load lifted, ill play along as life wans me to, as HE wans me to, and we'll see what happens. for good or for bad, ill persevere to the very end of my service.

Just had another epic time. staring into the sky from the ledge on my balcony. so close to death, yet so close to heaven. just starin in the sky, tinkin of the past, present and future. tht feeling is amazing, but yet burdenizing. ~_~ with tht ill end here.

always waiting. -9:16 AM

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

I've been... totally consumed. I thought I could take it, you're not the only one. I took it from u becuz of u, and its drivin me crazy. Its nt just u, every night it just comes back. With others, u just cant show it. Why? becuz it hurts thm. becuz, it destroys things, becuz, u just cant do it. But, if its nt urs, its nt for u to decide. U might say no one understands u. Tht might be fake. Im nt sayin tht urs is fake, just tht ur nt the only one goin thru it. Today, was the day, i was taken over. I thought i could control it, but i couldnt. for the pure reason of not wantin to. Tis time, no it doesnt feel gd, u just wanna do it, u just wanna harm urself. dun speculate, if u dunno. just stfu, and leave. Thr no longer is painkiller, its nt dota, its nt anything. i no longer take kindness, neither do i giv thm.

Hey boy, u knw, im nt a big guy, i dun hav the fats to protect me, u didnt hav to push me tht hard. I was talkin to him, u stole him from me halfway, and thn whn i tried to get him back, u just asked me to fuck off and push me away? tht hard? no self respect man, u dun hav to be tht cheap to get him, buey song just say, just say u wanna be right. u dun hav to make ppl realise tht and figure out its too late. i dun nid a sorry, but u show no sign of wrong doing. well i guess ur right, im always wrong.

Klins, dun do stupid stuff, if my reasons arent enuff, thn ill stop u. in total i probably sent u 5-10 3-6 smses long msgs. I hope u understand. thrs so many reasons how it will hurt urself, and 100 more to show how the rest around u are hurt.

Today's mt paper, nt enough time. didnt finish 2 qusetions which total up to 8. and thn the 5 questions mcq tikam-ed, so thts another 10 marks. As for science, i just cant rmb wad i nid to revise, so i didnt revise properly. flunked it, couldnt rmb some stuff like residue = =. But some things nt sure also get correct. last part realised nid to do 4 onli just whn teacher collecting, i did all 5. my last question gonna be cancelled... somemroe i did well for tht section, cuz it was just gone thru ytd = =. o wellz, thts bout it.

always waiting. -6:18 PM

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

4 Boyfriends

Once upon a time there was this girl who had four boyfriends.

She loved the 4th boyfriend the most and adored him with rich robes
and treated him to the finest of delicacies. She gave him nothing but
the best.

She also loved the 3rd boyfriend very much and was always showing him
off
to neighboring kingdoms. However, she feared that one day he would
leave her for another.

She also loved her 2nd boyfriend. He was her confidant and was always
kind,considerate and patient with her. Whenever this girl faced a
problem,

she could confide in him, and he would help her get through the
difficult times.

The girls 1st boyfriend was a very loyal partner and had made great contributions in maintaining her wealth and kingdom. However, she did not love the first boyfriend. Although he loved her deeply, she hardly took notice of him!

One day, the girl fell ill and she knew her time was short. She thought of her luxurious life and wondered, I now have four boyfriends with me, but when I die, I'll be all alone.'

Thus, she asked the 4th boyfriend, 'I loved you the most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?'

'No way!', replied the 4th boyfriend, and he walked away without another word..

His answer cut like a sharp knife right into her heart.

The sad girl then asked the 3rd boyfriend, 'I loved you all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?'

'No!', replied the 3rd boyfriend. 'Life is too good! When you die, I'm going to marry someone else!'

Her heart sank and turned cold.

She then asked the 2nd boyfriend, 'I have always turned to you for help and you've always been there for me.

When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?'

'I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!', replied the 2nd boyfriend. 'At the very most, I can only walk with you to your grave.'

His answer struck her like a bolt of lightning, and the girl was devastated.

Then a voice called out: 'I'll go with you... I'll follow you no matter where you go..'

The girl looked up, and there was his first boyfriend. He was very skinny as he suffered from malnutrition and neglect. Greatly grieved, the girl said, 'I should have taken much better care of you when I had the chance!'

In truth, you have 4 boyfriends in your lives:

Your 4th boyfriend is your body.. No matter how much time and effort you lavish in making it look good, it will leave you when you die.

Your 3rd boyfriend is your possessions, status and wealth.When you die, it will all go to others.

Your 2nd boyfriend is your family and friends. No matter how much they have been there for you, the furthest they can stay by you is up to the grave.

And your 1st boyfriend is your Soul. Often neglected in pursuit of wealth, power and pleasures of the world.

However, your Soul is the only thing that will follow you where ever you go.Cultivate, strengthen and cherish it now, for it is the only part of you that will follow you and continue with you throughout Eternity..

Pass this on to someone you care about - I just did. Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections!

Ok so today was art and literature, literature was ok, pretty ez i tink. Art is always too short, theory 10 marks art 90 marks? i studied theory like crazy man. So yea, spent 1hr on 10mark art questions, meaning finished 20 marks and chionged the rest 80 marks in another hour. = = Managed to finish, but Sec C nver do properly cuz it was kinda a rush, thn nver colour finish either, nt enough time to shade also. haiz, i tink flunk liao.

Thn went to find ms hii agn today, i tink i go find her with ancel they all too many times liao, she hit the stuff into my head. i tink im totally ok with science , just nid to rmb the cells thingy. sux. ok yea hate tmrw mt paper, hope i hav enuff time nia. ha thn some stuff happened, but ill keep it quiet. anyways, thts all.

always waiting. -7:49 PM

Monday

Ok, so i woke up at 4 agn ytd. studied my dnt. blah blah blah. Turned out, my brain power wasnt gd enuff and forgot lotsa stuffs. So i pretty much did badly for dnt, and probably, alot as well. its nt as bad as a fail, but its as bad as nt gettin an A... ok so anyway, had tirish fun today, as usual, cuz i was disturbing ancel aft he disturbed me, and i disturbed him cuz he was usin My comp, My account, My name. = =

Today art sure cmi, forgot to bring sketchbook home. ancel gt notes in his notebook, yay! scan scan scan, nver scan properly, o so sad he went home liao = =.

Anyway i was thinkin wad would happen if my aunts moved out, probably a betta life for us. but lookin on their side, theyll probably be lonely, somemore so old. haizz, ltr gt lao ren chi dai zen how. lawl. ok so yea.. thts it.

always waiting. -5:10 AM

Thursday, October 8, 2009

wozoew

today was, underwater day. at school tht is. Its a field trip. located whr? in sch. wad? yes. it rained so heavy, it gt flooded, even on 4th floor, nw i knw the floor is not straight. :) yea thn it gt mroe flooded and flooded as u went down, and the stairs, looked like rivers, with water flowing down it. Thn the cleaners all take broom sweep the water down to first floor lawlx. it gave u the chilly feeling and the underwater feeling, it was so kewlx. yea so thts about the most amazing thing bout today.

always waiting. -6:12 PM

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

keh, EOY coming liao, still so slack, still so lazy. haizz, i tink my chinese cmi. Anyway watched 2 movies today, argh. Standard, shows tht i actually watch finish sure i tink nice to watch, if nt nice, lawlx i wont even watch it. So yea, watched some movies thn loved the music, and so on, the usuals. If this time EOY cant get top 2 in the sch, i can ban myself liaozxc. 3 position is bad enuff... = =

always waiting. -12:10 AM

Friday, October 2, 2009

-1=243-rs

long time no post ah, but today lotsa stuff happened, like how we gt pwnt in mt class, forgot how it passed. Thn for geog, it was like revise and test, blah blah blah. Thn EL, thn music. The most fun period. Why? no not the lesson. Cuz we were f-ing busy with the floor filled with lead, pencil lead. Made it so smooth, can slide, thn it was like backslide, matrix slide, slide attack, moonwalk and yea. Thn ok... our class key gt stuck in the ceiling. it was like wth and hahahaha. anyway gt it down finally. thn the cher, talk to us in the last 5 min, wah srsly sad, some ppl still talk bout dota, no heart bastard. Thn zj came to my house, thn ant, and jarren. One of the best laugh days i had. laughed like crazy, especially whn i was licking the biscuit, it was like... lick, lick, lick, OMG ANTHONY! *piack*(biscuit breaks and drop onto the floor). aha. one of the best days, so sad it had to go so soon. anyway, thts all for today.

always waiting. -6:38 PM

the one who waits.

Name:Sky
Bday:05/01

and they say

the forgotten memories.

June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010
March 2010
April 2010
May 2010
June 2010
July 2010
August 2010
September 2010
October 2010
November 2010
December 2010
January 2011
February 2011
March 2011
March 2012
May 2014
June 2015

the music in my veins.

the roads that lead away.

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